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Taxes Information |
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Tax Jokes and Quotes
Do you realize that some tax forms ask you to check a box if you are BLIND? Quote: "Two years ago it was impossible to get through on the phone to the IRS. Now it's just hard to get through. That's progress." -Charles Rossotti, former IRS Commissioner Disappointed that you never had time to write the great American novel? Don't fret, just go dig out your past tax returns. Quote: "The Eiffel Tower is the Empire State Building after taxes." Under the Freedom of Information Act, a man with a small business sent a request to the IRS asking if they had a file on him. The IRS wrote back, "There is now." Quote: "It would be nice if we could all pay our taxes with a smile, but normally cash is required." Q: Who audits IRS agents? Quote: "Next to being shot at and missed, nothing is quite as satisfying as an income tax refund." Q: How do you drive a CPA insane? A: Fill out Form 1040EZ. Quote: "The government deficit is the difference between the amount of money the government spends and the amount it has the nerve to collect." Why is it that when the IRS loses a tax return, it is considered a mistake, but when you lose a receipt, it is considered tax evasion? Quote: "The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling." Q: How do you humble a person that flaunts their wealth? A: Have them fill out a tax return. Quote: "Even when you make a tax form out on the level, you don't know when it's through if you are a crook or a martyr." Q: Why is a tax audit like a tornado? A: There's a lot of screaming and you end up losing your house. Quote: "When are we going to be allowed to list the government as a dependent?" People often say death and taxes are the same, but thisis wrong. Death is a taxable event, but taxes never die. Richard Chapo is CEO of http://www.businesstaxrecovery.com - Obtaining tax refunds for small businesses by finding overlooked tax deductions and credits through a free tax return review.
MORE RESOURCES: RIVERWOODS, Ill., Feb. 7, 2012 /PRNewswire/ -- As more and more baby boomers are reaching retirement age, they'll have many factors to consider in choosing where to live in retirement, including the tax ... When it comes to taxes, it seems that everyone has an opinion. Whether it's the way they're spent (or misspent), or whether we should pay less (or someone else should pay more), this surprisingly feisty ... NEW YORK (TheStreet) - Candidate Mitt Romney wants you to believe he will lower taxes while cutting the national debt. But President Romney will need to raise taxes if he is going to have any chance of lowering U.S. debt, according to his former private equity pals. Now a strong frontrunner for the Republican presidential nomination, Romney has repeatedly said that cutting the national debt ... WASHINGTON, Feb. 6 (UPI) -- Small U.S. business owners are unhappy with the amount of taxes large corporations and their executives pay, a recent survey indicates. With tax season getting under way, today I'll answer reader questions about property taxes, the new Medicare surcharge starting in 2013 and how to get those old-fashioned paper tax forms. Q: Tony G. asks, "Has anything... Small business owners see corporate tax loopholes and the shifting of U.S. profits to offshore tax havens as serious problems, according to a new independent national poll. Small business owners think big corporations and the wealthy don’t pay their fair share of taxes, the poll shows. Retirees can face hefty taxation if they don't follow certain strategies when managing their money. Using these tactics will help lower the bill. Kevin Drum looks at how regressive taxes are at the state and local level, an issue that doesn’t get nearly enough attention. These strange taxes are making everything from bagels to hot air balloon rides more expensive. Is it April Fool’s Day? Has somebody in Paris hacked the website at the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development? Have we been transported to a parallel dimension where up is down and black is white? |
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